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  • Junwen Chen

Till Death Do Us Part

Updated: Apr 24

Dedicated to the living, and to those who have lost their loved ones.


We have learned a lot of things in school.


But death wasn’t one of them.


Our textbooks had almost nothing on aging, frailty or dying.


How the process unfolds, how people experience the end of their lives, and how it affects those around them seemed completely unimportant, hence no educational materials or resources were included in our education.


Yet in the process of growing up and growing old, experiencing the death of someone we know either directly or indirectly is inevitable.



1) Death is not a failure.



Death is normal. With life, there will be death.


For some, death may be the enemy, but it’s also the natural order of things.


There’s no escaping the tragedy of life, which is that we are all aging from the day we are born. One may even come to understand and accept this fact.


Death does not always have to be perceived as a failure or as something negative. While the death of a loved one may bring us tremendous grief, we can also celebrate the achievements and wonderful ways in which they have impacted those around them while they were alive.



2) Death is not the greatest tragedy.



The greatest tragedy would instead be to live mindlessly through each day as though death would not ever occur, to waste the precious time we have alive.


To not think that our time alive is finite and not, therefore, strive to fulfill our dreams and aspirations.


The graveyard is the richest place on earth, because it is here that you will find all the hopes and dreams that were never fulfilled, the books that were never written, the songs that were never sung, the inventions that were never shared, the cures that were never discovered, all because someone was too afraid to take that first step, keep with the problem, or remain determined to carry out their dream.


Live each day as if you were dying. Cherish the time you have and make the fullest of it.



3) Death is not fearsome.



What’s truly fearsome is giving up.


We can live for forty days without food, four days without water, and four minutes without air. But we cannot live for four seconds without hope.


When we give up, all hope is lost.


“Keep going. Everything you need will come to you at the perfect time.” -Unknown



4) Death is not planned.



Tomorrow is not guaranteed.


Take nothing for granted.


Death can be either expected or unexpected.


Live as if you were to die tomorrow.

Learn as if you were to live forever.


Do not count the days.

Make the days count.



5) Death is not the worst.



What’s worse can be the suffering of self and others.


Many people may think that death is the worst thing that can happen to themselves or their loved ones.


But what happens if the person is struck with a condition that paralyzes him for the rest of his life? Or requires long term care and medication? Or if he needs the assistance of a life support machine just to survive? Which will be more painful for him and the family?



6) Death is not just about mourning and grieving.



It is also about the remembrance of a life.


We will face the end of our journeys someday. As mentioned earlier, death is the natural order of life. Before we face the end of our journeys, let’s ask ourselves what we would like to see when we look back at the end. What was our life like? What lessons did we learn? Did we do our best to try to achieve what was important to us? Did we have a positive impact on those around us, no matter how minute it may seem?


We always have the choice to either live a life filled with regrets and disappointments, or a life filled with love, giving, caring, sharing and contributing to the world around you.

What lessons would you like others to be able to learn from you? How will you be an example for the rest? What would you like others to remember you for?



7) Death is not the end.



It is the beginning of a new life.


It may be the end of the road for a person here on this earth. But in heaven, there’s an eternal life waiting for him, without any pain and suffering.


It may be the end of the road for him. But for his loved ones, the memories will last forever.




For me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain.


You never know what you are losing, till you lose it.

You never know what you are searching for, till you find it.

Live in the present, for that’s the best present you can give to those around you.


We have one life to live.

Let’s live it to the fullest.



#designthylife

#lifecoaching

#lifeplanning

#death

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